Alpha Cook

The scene in our kitchen almost got ugly last night. Len really wanted a dish I make, orzo pilaf. He did not mean for me to make it, since I'd been in the kitchen all day canning tomatoes and pickles. I doubted his ability, it isn't that he is a bad cook, but he has his own ideas which are weird and sometimes scary. Also, his friend, Hal (one of the best cooks I know) was over. And. Well, let's just say that Len is usually on the losing side of their Trying to Drink Each Other Under the Table contests.

So I asked him if he was sure he didn't want me to make this thing.
Him: No, no, just tell me what to do.
Me: Chop up an onion. Now garlic. Now you saute the onion until soft, then add the garlic and cook for about 30 seconds, then you will add the orzo and saute until nicely brown.
Him: So I assume the onion just gets cooked in there somehow?
Me: Are you sure you don't want me to do this?
Him: Well, I guess that would mean Hal and I could check the grill and smoke.

Hello. My name is Lee and I am an alpha cook. I'd like to think I am not as bad as my sister, who's own daughter says, "she wants to do everything herself, then you have to tell her how good it is." I did let him chop the onion, after all. And he did fine.

Judy and Gwen do not question my position in the kitchen. As long as I don't disturb their nap.